In my view, baptism at 8 is just a variation on infant baptism. Finding a person with whom your wavelength matches, and around whom you feel you can just be yourself, talk about anything, and not be worried about being judged, is not as easy as the romantic movies and TV soaps make it out to be. I tried my best, every bit of me…. So basically we were lies to for years.
Hence the suspicious quotes around "adequately. To them, everyone is either TBM, hasn't learned the truth yet, or has some kind of personal failing laziness, desire to sin, allowed themself to be deceived by satan, etc. If you stay together l, you are going to have to remind her of that commitment. Find some small proxy act of affection that can be done regularly to say that he cares about you, and that can be kept sacred as a stand-in for everything else that's missed. But this phase isn't going to be short. Do you really love him, honey. But it is luck of the draw. My boyfriend and I are both in medical school and it is so difficult to manage a relationship while surviving the class load.
I think patience and understanding is also important. Someone already said it, but unless you are planning on converting, this is a dead end relationship. So, I can only imagine the stories you hear.
But realistically, if she is not open minded enough to even listen to someone who has a contrasting view of the church - how will she not continually discount you and your lack of beliefs. She is in pretty deep and culture is a powerful force. If it's true, it'll come out of the criticism looking better.